preparetodrop asked: Have you ever found the book, "The Lusty Argonian Maid" in Skyrim? It's really funny. It's a porn book lol
oh my god my housemate was watching me play and we found it and nearly fell off the couch laughing. Then the boys noticed we were crying in tears of laughter and we read it out to them, me being the seductive man and Donna beinng the innocent argonian maid. Giggles were had throughout the household.
| Lifts-Her-Tail: | Certainly not, kind sir! I am here but to clean your chambers. |
|---|---|
| Crantius Colto: | Is that all you have come here for, little one? My chambers? |
| Lifts-Her-Tail: | I have no idea what it is you imply, master. I am but a poor Argonian maid. |
| Crantius Colto: | So you are, my dumpling. And a good one at that. Such strong legs and shapely tail. |
| Lifts-Her-Tail: | You embarrass me, sir! |
| Crantius Colto: | Fear not. You are safe here with me. |
| Lifts-Her-Tail: | I must finish my cleaning, sir. The mistress will have my head if I do not! |
| Crantius Colto: | Cleaning, eh? I have something for you. Here. Polish my spear. |
| Lifts-Her-Tail: | But it is huge! It could take me all night! |
| Crantius Colto: | Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time. |
| Mjoll the lioness: | I'm itching for a fight.. |
|---|---|
| Ant: | (without skipping a beat) you should get that checked out. |
(Source: 500daysofevilexes, via cheekofnight)
He fixed my laptop for me!
I came home from work today and i dragged him along to woolies to get some groceries and he goes ‘oh yea i fixed your laptop too btw.’
And that ladies and gentlemen is why i let him have a snack before dinner :P
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